We all want to be happy right? That’s was we strive for in life. But sometimes, it’s hard to be happy when life gets hard and circumstances out of your control come into play. I myself can be a downer at times. So, I came up with a list of 10 ways to be happier and positive in your life. Some of these are easy to implement, others take more time and practice.
Love Yourself and be nice to yourself
You are either your biggest cheerleader or your worst critic.
Think of how you talk to yourself. Do you talk yourself up or bring yourself down? If you wouldn’t say what you say to yourself to your best friend, you shouldn’t say it about yourself. You need to be your own best friend. Your relationship with yourself is the longer relationship you will be in so make it a good one!
How to put this in practice: Practice positive self talk. Everyday try to say at least 3 things you like about yourself or 3 nice things about yourself. Write them down in a journal so you remember them and so you can refer back to them when you have a really down day.
Surround yourself with positive people
The people in your circle dictate you as a person. If you surround yourself with people who complain, you will complain. If you surround yourself with people you have a positive mindset, you in turn will be positive.
Find people that lift you up, but also tell you how it is. You want people who are supportive while also having your best interest in mind. You might be friends with someone who is toxic in your life.
A toxic person is described as anyone who is abusive, unsupportive, or unhealthy emotionally—someone who basically brings you down more than up.
How to put this in practice: Think of how you feel when you are with your friends, but mainly when you talk about your dreams, goals, and future. Evaluate your relationship and determine if they are someone who you want to be around. Do they encourage your new ideas? Do they shut you down? Do they challenge your idea, but in a supportive way? Do they think you are stupid and if you do what ever you are thinking doing they won’t support you? Do they only care/talk about themselves? If you find your friend is toxic, it’s up to you to figure out if you want that negativity in your life or slowly cut them out. It’s entirely up to you.
Realize what you can and can’t control
Once you understand what is actually in your control, it can help you focus on those things instead of worrying about the things that are out of your control.
If you are worrying about something, what in that situation is in your control? Think about it, write it down, and make a plan.
Example: Right now when I’m writing this, we are in quarantine. We don’t know how long we are in this, what the outcome is, and I don’t know how long I have to work from home. What I can control, my attitude everyday, if my environment is clean and organized, my workout plan and my diet, if I am keeping to my morning and night routine.
Find routines that are consistent and put you in a good mood
I love a good routine to keep me happy. It goes along with what you can control. It’s consistent. But also with routines comes with being able to make time for yourself (a little self care) and things that you enjoy.
I have the typical morning and night routines, but I also have a self care sunday routine, bath routine, cleaning routine, etc just to give you some ideas.
How to put this into practice: Start with a morning and night routine. I bet you probably do the same thing everyday when you are going to bed when you take the time to do every. Be mindful of what you are doing and keep to that routine. Once you have a morning and night routine that you enjoy, try to make a self care routine or something that you can look forward to.
Make goals that are attainable and focus on things you can control
I like the next person love to set goals for myself to set out to achieve.
If you have goals that have elements that are outside of your control, it’s hard to evaluate why they didn’t get accomplished.
If you have goals that don’t have a plan, they are just dreams.
How to put this into practice: You need to set out time to map out how you are going to achieve those goals. Work backwards from your goal and do it in baby steps. If my goal was to grow my Insta following, I know that to get more people to follow me, I need to provide value, connect with them, talk to new people, and be consistent with my content. Take time to make the plan.
Disconnect and take time off
It’s easy to just go go go, but it’s hard to take a pause and just be. I always feel like I have to be doing something productive so I get it, it’s hard! But if you are able to take a day or weekend off from your 9-5 job, your side hustle, your obligations, it will help you come back even better and with a fresher mind.
How to put this into practice: Take a weekend off. Literally turn everything off that will make you feel like you want to work and do something for you. Prep the week before so people know you are away and if you need something to be scheduled, try to have it auto publish at a certain time. This will be good for your work-life balance, relationship with your partner, and with yourself.
Treat your body right
You are what you eat and what you eat late at night. If you eat like crap, you feel like crap. You need to nourish your body with foods that actually do good things for you. I’m not saying deprive yourself, but really think about if you need that 4th cookie today, maybe just have 1.
Exercising doesn’t have to be a 1000 calorie-burning cardio workout every day. If you want to see certain results you will have to make sacrifices, but you can also exercise because you love your body and you want to treat it right.
How to put this into practice: When it comes to eating, try to add something into your diet before taking something away. Add more veggies and once that is a new norm, try cutting back on dessert every night. You want to focus on long term success not a quick fix. For exercise, start with walking before you run. Do some strength training and see what you enjoy doing to move your body.
Acknowledge your emotions and be able to work through them
Working through your emotions takes time, practice, and patience, you might even need to seek outside help to come up with coping mechanisms. Acknowledging your emotions is going to help when you need to process things that happen in your life big or small that you don’t know how to handle. Once you acknowledge them, then you can move to how you are going to handle them.
This has taken me years with constant practice and awareness. There have been times when I finally got it down and then something happens where I completely forgot all my practice and have to find something else that helps.
How to put this into practice: My number one recommendation would be to seek professional help. Someone that isn’t biased, doesn’t know you, has an outside opinion, and degree or something. Meditation also helps a lot of people to connect with their emotions to help center themselves. But that’s all I have for practice for this tip.
Force a smile even when you don’t want to
Sometimes you have to fake it till you make it. That even applies to your attitude. It’s hard to smile when all you want to do is lay in your bed, stare at the ceiling and cry. Trust me, I know.
But if you smile more and force yourself to try to be positive and happy, it can work if you really try. This won’t work all the time because there are days where you need to cry and let it out but if it consumes you and you are spending days doing so, you need to try.
How to put this into practice: Next time you are in a bad mood, do something that is the complete opposite of what you want to do. Want to lay in bed? Go on a walk. Go to a coffee shop so you have to get out and see people. You don’t want to be that person in public who looks miserable so say hi to someone on your walk and compliment the barista on their hair. You will feel a little bit better and you might totally make someone’s day in return.
Allow yourself to do something fun just for fun
Have a hobby, start a new project, dance and act goofy. If you can learn to let loose and not feel like you always have to be productive or doing something, you will be able to find joy on the slow days.
How to put this into practice: What’s something that you enjoyed doing as a kid? Go back to that time and try to be a kid again. Ride your bike, play with sidewalk chalk, color, anything, just do something for funzies!
What is something from this list that you are going to try to implement today to be happier?!
XO, Annie